Where are we now?

Wednesday
10-26-16
4:11am

Where are we now?

I don't know the answer to any
of the questions
clouding my
brain
my mind
my body hurts
from my being
not knowing
what is
or what is not
I feel dead
in a trance
a weird, out of body-
or just
out of "if"
feeling
when will it end?
this month?
this year?
the day?
the hour?
It's already past 4am
and still
I get no rest
yet
no fatigue is
felt
instead, I'm here
searching
for things I do not even
know
exist
Where am I?
Who-
am I?
What do I stand for?
I have wandered, I have run
far from the comforts of norms
I have always hated and
now I am in a big
plain field, within perfect
sight
of all my insecurities
enemies, withdrawls, and annoyances
There is no where to
go, or hide
there is no where
I rather be
than growing by default
because there is no
other way
to get through this field, this
desert of 40 years
plus
who knows how
long
it will
take
I still
love..
I still love
you,
life...
;)