RIP M.R.D

And It's Gone

Dazed, dizzy, tripping 

over myself,

my blood begins to thicken as

it turns dark black

I smile down watching

my veins fill with

darkness

the room spinning

my face blurred

and I can't stop laughing

It all feels too good

my parents are in their

own distress, but I 

cant hear a word they

shout at me

only smirk at their 

moving mouths with extreme

looks of concern painted 

on their troubled faces

The music begins to play

as he walks in through the front door

picking me up from the floor, I 

didn't even know I was on

We are now in his car, he's speeding

into no where, not knowing 

where to go

I have always been the leader,

his gps, the guide to his life

and so I order my driver to 

stop, park far from everything

and I pull him close

His cold tears drip on my face

as I kiss him passionately,

biting his lips, sucking on 

his tongue 

His body trembles as mine

pulsates, radiating my 

heat

He is lost, lost in what to do, lost

in me, lost in the moment, lost in

us.

"Make love to me, baby",

I whisper to him

Clumsy, unzipping his jeans, ripping

off his shirt, I lay watching him, 

smiling in my 

daze he knows nothing of.

His ways of doing as told make

me giggle and feel somewhat

superior to his love struck sadness

My mouth opens with laughter as my eyes

squint from my big cheeks

I grab him, pulling him closer before

he's even done undressing 

his frail body collapsing upon my

full figured Brazilian body

My body is on fire, his tears sizzle

raining on it

Our passionate wrestling of tongues 

intrigues body sensations and they begin 

to dance with one another

He has no clue, and I couldn't care less

"Turn up the music", I demand 

He doesn't know what to do, always

needs to be told

I cant help but to giggle some

more and again, pull him in the right

direction, back on top of me.

His body so fragile, tiny, trembling, 

his sweat now keeping up with his tears

I feel his mind going crazy, too many questions

not understanding anything, but wanting it all

He is going insane, and our love is just that.

As I feel it begin, I slow down and kiss him softly

I look deep in his eyes and smile.

He is lost.

Completely.

Looking at me with the million thoughts and questions

racing in his mind, not able to formulate any of it

into words.

"This is how I wanted it, I love you.."

He shakes my weak body, as the pieces of life's 

puzzle start to assemble themselves in his frantic mind.

I hear him yelling, but I smile and am ready.

The car door opens and it gets darker

He pulls my body out and sticking his fingers deep 

in my throat, I become dizzy, nauseous and annoyed

He drowns me with bottles of water, pinching my 

nostrils closed.

As I choke and lose my breath, I hurl out broken white 

pieces of big pills

He is crying as I perched on the side of his car, sitting in 

my own concoction of the ticket out of here

I missed my flight, he wouldn't 

let me

go..

And now,

he is the one 

that's gone.